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[American Story] SENEWS-2007-0728-FEATURE

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The Traffic Department informed agent Flannery that he should take 160 guinea-pigs to Mr. Morehouse and collect 25 cents for each of them. Agent Flannery wired back, ”I’ve got eight hundred now, should I collect for eight hundred or what? How about the 64 dollars a day for cabbages to feed them?”

Many letters went back and force. Flandry was crowed into a few feet at the extreme front of the office. The guinea-pigs sat off the rest of the room. Time kept moving on as the letters continue to go back and forth. Flannery now had 4064 guinea-pigs. He was beginning to lose control of himself. Then, he got a telegram from the company that’s said “error in guinea-pig bill, collect for two guinea-pigs 50 cents”. Flandry run all of the way to Mr. Morehouse’s home, but Mr. Morehouse had moved. Flandry searched for him in town but without success. He returned to the express office and found that 206 guinea-pigs had entered the world since he left the office. At last, he got an urgent telegram from the main office “Send the pigs to the main office of the company at Flanklin”. Flandry did so. Soon came another telegram “Stop sending pigs. Warehouse full”. But he kept sending them. Agent Flandry finally got three of the guinea-pigs. “Rules may be rules”, he said. But so long as Flandry runs this express office, pig is pets and cows is pets and horses is pets and lions and tigers and rocky mountain goats is pets. And rate on them is 25 cents. Then he looked around and said cheerfully (chiefly), “well, any how it is not as bad as might (I have) been. What if they guinea-pigs had been elephants?”

You have heard story Pigs is Pigs. It was written by Ellis Parker Butler. Your story teller was Sharp O’Neal. The story was published by Random House in 1945 in the best of American humorous short stories. It is copyrighted all rights reserved. From VOA Special English, this is Shirley Griffin.
Mile by mile it's a trial, yard by yard it's hard, but inch by inch it's a cinch.
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